Why I’ll Never Discuss Weight With My Daughter.

‘Mummy I can’t eat these, the fat number is too high’.

Those words came from my five-year old daughter’s mouth. Those words left me feeling sick, scared of the influence the world was already having on her impressionable mind.

My weight has always yo yo’d, but I’ve never been bigger than a size 14, I don’t stress over what size I am and I have never discussed my size or the size of others with her. She herself has a very slight frame and a fast metabolism meaning she can eat like a horse and not gain a pound – something I envy, but don’t think on.

My family differs, being overweight runs in our family, meaning that the middle generation are very wary of any kind of weight gain, I grew up with it, I still get the remarks, and I don’t want that for my little girl.

I want her to love herself entirely, big or small, short or tall, happy or sad, I want her to embrace everything about herself, because what she looks like doesn’t make her who she is. I won’t allow her to feel under any pressure to gain, lose, or maintain a weight. I will allow her to be exactly who she is, eat whatever she wants and be happy doing so.

Why had she said this? Five year old girl’s should be thinking about what princess dress to wear or what colour bow to put in their hair, not how much fat is in what they are eating, not how big or small they are, young girls should be just that, young, and free, and completely blissfully unaware of the judgmental world we live in.

I can only guess that one of her friend’s at school has an older sister who has hit the stage where things like calories seem important or heaven forbid, another child has commented on her tiny frame. I don’t diet, I don’t calorie count, I rarely check the fat content on products and if I do it isn’t in front of her. Her refusal to eat that day has left me fearful and desperate to shelter her from what the world see’s as perfect.

I don’t want to raise a naive child, she is aware that everyone is built differently and sometime’s others work in different ways, but one thing I want her to always understand is that no matter how big or small or tall or short a person is, it doesn’t change their soul. The outside bares no reflection of the inside, if someone has a good heart, then that is all that matters.

I will never discuss weight with my daughter, but I will discuss self-love and try my hardest to nurture her into a loving adult, open to everyone, no matter how they look or act.

weight daughter motherhood parenting

3 Little Buttons
Dear Bear and Beany

6 Comments

  1. Cathryn - Little Paper Swans 23rd February 2017 / 1:09 pm

    Oh that’s awful that she said that. Poor girly. It’s so hard isn’t it. I don’t know what I would say to my daughter. You’re doing the right thing teaching her to love herself the way she is. I will certainly be taking your approach to this when my daughter is older!

    #SharingTheBlogLove

    • Chloe Weir 23rd February 2017 / 1:12 pm

      Thank you for your kind comment x

  2. Katy - Hot Pink Wellingtons 27th February 2017 / 12:36 pm

    Oh, five is so little to come out with something like that! I’d have been upset too. My weight has always fluctuated too – I’d say I’m a natural size 12, but have been a 16 and an 8 in the past, and not always had the best attitude to my body. Like you, I come from a family where weight has been a problem – more for my grandparents generation, but it’s something that I’ve always been conscious of. For what it’s worth, I think you’re taking the right approach. Weight and body image are always going to come up as she gets older, but teaching her to love herself is a good, healthy attitude and hopefully gives her the best foundation. Thanks for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

  3. Bridie By The Sea 28th February 2017 / 12:42 am

    Oh it makes me so sad that she said that. I had some eating issues growing up and I’m so determined to make sure emma is more confident than I was. I think your approach is perfect. Thanks so much for linking up to #dreamteam hope to see you next time 🙂 x

  4. Laura - Dear Bear and Beany 28th February 2017 / 2:27 pm

    Oh my goodness that is little for her to be saying this. I would have been really upset if this was my daughter. My eldest will be 5 this summer. Having two daughters I am very aware that they have a healthy relationship with their body and that they don’t hear words like ‘fat’ and ‘diet’ etc in our house. You have a great attitude and the right approach. Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

  5. Annette, 3 Little Buttons 6th March 2017 / 11:11 am

    It’s such a tricky one isn’t it. We don’t want to raise too much awareness at a young age to make them worried, but at the same time, we want them to grow up wanting to eat healthy food. Mine tends to say, I can’t eat that, it’s got too much sugar. But it has nothing to do with weight. I tell her too much sugar will give her a headache lol. Thanks so sharing with the #dreamteam x

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