I’m A Young Mum, And I’m Not Ashamed.

When people ask how old I am, and I reply with 24, they quickly do the maths and realize I became a mum at a  young age. I was 18 when I had Mia, in college and living a typical teenage life. I was care-free, I knew children were in my future, but not my near future.

If you’ve read ‘I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant’ you’ll know that her arrival was far from expected. Her birth left me in a state of shock for months, for months it felt like my life had been turned upside down.

Eventually, once the dust had settled, I knew she’d been sent to me for a reason, she saved me.

I didn’t leave the house for the first few weeks of her life, I was petrified of the looks I’d get and the comments that would be whispered behind my back. I should have been proud of my beautiful little girl, but I hid.

Many assume young mum’s are bad mum’s. Some of the stereotypical comments I’ve heard/read over the years have filled me with fury. I have cried, I’ve raged, I refuse to be tarred with the same brush.

At 19 I became pregnant again, this time with my little Theo. By the age of 20 I was a mother of two.

Most of the girls I went to school with were at university or in full-time high-flying jobs. I’d swapped notepads for coloring books and nights out for night feeds. I’d put my aspirations on hold to be there for Mia, and that was okay.

I realized I couldn’t control fate. If my children had arrived in ten years time, they wouldn’t be the children they are. They wouldn’t be the children that have made me whole.

When I announced my pregnancy with Theo I lost a lot of friends.

All those who had kept their assumptions at bay just couldn’t hold back any more. It broke my heart, but nothing was going to stop me embracing those early days, not this time.

At 24, I have a 6 and a 4-year-old, and I couldn’t be prouder. It’s not been easy, but I have no regrets. Becoming a mother at 18 wasn’t the path I thought I’d follow, but it was the right one.

When Mia turns 18, I’ll be 36. Still young enough to show her a decent night out and probably embarrass her greatly. Their grand-parents are younger than average, they have the ability to do more with the added bonus of handing them back at the end of the day. Would they have been so pro-active if I’d had children at 30?

I truly believe that there is no ‘right time’ to have a child. Having my children young has given me new aspirations and opportunities I wouldn’t have had otherwise.

I don’t let the fear of judgement consume me anymore except from the rare occasions when I’m the youngest one at toddler groups or someone assumes I’m Mia’s big sister. I’m not ashamed to be a young mum, and you shouldn’t be either.

Age is just a number – it’s love that counts.

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  1. Ice Cream Clara Blog 1st June 2017 / 5:25 pm

    Aw I loved this so much! I had my little boy at 19 and it was so surreal, I found the early days so tough and developed CFS/ME about 2 months after the birth >< I had so many disapproving glances from old ladies that broke my heart, it makes me feel very sad how society and the media have a stigma against young parents <3 I can't wait to read more from your blog, it's so lovely! 😀 xx

    elizabeth ♡ ”Ice Cream” whispers Clara
    (lets follow each other on bloglovin or instagram)

  2. Kim Carberry 1st June 2017 / 8:43 pm

    Aww! Young parents who do a great job like you have no reason to be ashamed….It’s those young parents who parent badly give people a bad name….
    I used to look young for my age and had my first when I was 22. People assumed I was a lot younger including midwives and the staff at the hospital. They had sharp words from me. People can be so judgemental and it’s unfair x

  3. Jessica Weedon 2nd June 2017 / 9:20 pm

    It brought a tears to my eyes thinking that you were worried about leaving the house after having your first little one. There will always be judgmental people out there – what matters is that you are an amazing mummy not the age you had her.

    I knew a lady that had her first child at the age of 14 back in the 60’s and people actually crossed the road to avoid her. It broke her.

    You sound like a great mum and I can’t wait to read more from you. Lots of love x❤️

  4. dearbearandbeany 6th June 2017 / 7:48 pm

    I love that last sentence, age is just a number, it’s love that counts. Just beautiful! It makes me sad that you hid away when you first had your gorgeous girl. I’m so pleased that you are now in a better place and shouting it from the roof tops. Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

  5. Mrs Mummy Harris 6th June 2017 / 10:19 pm

    To put it into perspective, my nan was married at 16 which is crazy to think she couldnt even drink a toast at her own wedding!
    I’ll hold my hands up and say i’ve been judgemental of young mums in the past but where i’m from its one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in England and it was common to see a fellow school pupil in uniform with a baby bump. So I guess it made me judgemental but at the end of the day, as long as the child is well looked after and is healthy and happy who cares?
    Mia is the spitting image of you and Theo with his bow tie is just adorable. It sounds like you’re an amazing mother and probably doing a better job then others out there! Keep your chin up lovely #sharingthebloglove

  6. Lucy At Home 8th June 2017 / 3:09 pm

    You can’t choose when life happens to you – that’s exactly what my newest blog post is about! It’s not necessarily the way we planned, but it can still be the best thing ever! I was 24 when I had my first and even that seems strange to people because it’s so young.

    P.S. I LOVE your matching santa dresses! #sharingthebloglove

  7. Louise 11th June 2017 / 10:29 pm

    This has obviously shown you who your true friends are! Some of the best mums I know were young mums, and sometimes I think we can be quick to judge, but as long as the child is happy and loved, does it matter how old their parents are? The funny thing is that you look back 50 years or so and 18 was a pretty normal age to be settling down and starting a family. Well done to you #sharingthebloglove

  8. Jade @ Captured By Jade 22nd June 2017 / 5:54 pm

    The story you’ve shared here is wonderful, and the closing line so true! I do think people are quick to judge young parents, and for no reason – if you are judging someone then it should be on their merits and not stereotypes!

    We have a lot of young mums in our family, so it feels quite normal to me; I had my little boy at 22, which seems to young to some also. #DreamTeam

  9. Annette, 3 Little Buttons 25th June 2017 / 5:33 pm

    I love this! You are so right that love is the thing that really counts the most. I’m sorry to hear that you haven’t always been on the positive end of comments being a young mum. I take my hat off to you, and at the same time, I wish I had been lucky enough to have children younger. #Dreamteam x

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